Ex-Star Trek second banana Jonathan Frakes has directed a Back to the Future redux that John Ashcroft and David Duke could embrace. In the Beemers-only section of a Spielbergian hamlet, upscale teen Zak (Jesse Bradford) and his moneyed girl Francesca (Paula Garcés) get hold of a device that freezes time, allowing the user to go way fast and become invisible. What to do with such a device? Clockstoppers answers with a laff-riot extended club sequence in which Zak's rhythm-challenged, minimum-wage-earning, dimwitted black pal Meeker (Garikayi Mutambirwa) is manipulated into learning how to scratch, moonwalk, and do other African-American stuff by his amused white friends. Meanwhile, arch villain Gates (Michael Biehn) is chased by black-op scumbags (the good guys here) who will kill to get back the clock-stopping whatsit, lest it fall into the hands of "the Saddams of the world." A children's film from the patriotic folks at Nickelodeon and the writer of Friday the 13th Part VIII: Jason Takes Manhattan.