Of course it opens with a sex scene. Where did you think tiger cubs came from? Sangha and Kumal (the two brothers of the title) squeak and fumble around an Indochine jungle paradise until a jingoist Indiana Jones (Guy Pearce) channels his inner Ted Nugent and sets in motion a string of opportunities for animal abuse until a happy ending occurs, about 30 minutes later than necessary. Too dull (and traumatic) to be a true family film, the antsy factor increased exponentially among the kids in the screening as scenes of adults flapping their yaps about colonial politics and infrastructure interspersed with tigers looking thoughtful, tigers looking sad, and tigers behaving in anthropomorphized, untigerlike ways. The best scenes juxtapose the actors and the cubs (who resemble thick, clumsy house cats and are undeniably adorable). But distract from the narrative as you reflect on the amazing opportunity the actor has to interact with a baby big cat. The movie ends with a rejoinder that less than 5,000 tigers still live in the wild. Well, wouldn’t not recruiting them for films be a great way to keep them there? Gluttons for punishment will invite a vegan, an anti-IMF activist, and a sensitive child along. Good luck keeping all of them happy.