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Fantastic Four

By Bret McCabe | Posted 7/13/2005

Somebody needs to give Nip/Tuck’s Julian McMahon a medal, a raise, or something for injecting a modicum of fun into one of the most tedious and cheesiest comic-book adaptations since Captain America. McMahon does everything save twirl a moustache fiendishly as Victor Von Doom, the deep pockets behind sad-sack scientist Reed Richards’ (Ioan Gruffudd) space experiment. Von Doom has it all: money, good looks, and Richards’ ex, smarty-pants hottie Sue Storm (Jessica Alba). But up in space Richards, his partner Ben (Michael Chiklis), Storm, her extreme-sports-junkie brother Johnny (Chris Evans), and Von Doom get caught in a cosmic storm (and some Doctor Who-silly special effects). They return to New York to discover things done changed. Richards goes all rubbery stretchy, Sue can blush invisible, Johnny can ignite himself on fire, Ben turns into freaking moving stone—though Chiklis Thingified looks like a Muppet—and Von Doom slowly turns into metal and can manipulate electricity. Picture Von Doom turning well-dressed bad guy and forcing the remaining four to battle him and you’ve got one really blasé movie trailer. Now, imagine sitting through it for 90 minutes.

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